7 Freshers you’ll meet:
We know we all like to think of ourselves as an individual but when you come to university there will be seven Freshers you will definitely meet. To make sure you’re prepared, here is what to expect…
– The Everyman – Every time you bump into this character, they’re involved in a different society. You’re not sure whether they mistakenly brought the Freshers’ Fayre sentiment of “grab everything and RUN” to the Bunfight by mistake, or they have simply consumed too much of the Bridge Bar’s coffee, but this fresher has their hands in everything from Cake Decorating to Skydiving. Befriend them immediately for an exciting insight into the bizarre range of stuff you can get up to at SUSU, provided they have enough time to talk between the debating society and their next show on SUSU radio station Surge.
– The Socialite – Party is a verb, and this fresher came to fight for the right. You’ll bump into this vibrant centre of attention at every house party, club night and live show you care to attend, and everyone seems to know who they are. And of course, knowing lots of people might result in Big Name On Campus (BNOC)status, and from there… Provided they don’t burn out both ends of the candle in first year.
– ‘Trackies’ – This fresher discovered comfort and a sense of unbridled freedom when they wore trackies to a lecture for the first time, deciding life isn’t worth a thing if you can’t exist in that state of nirvana on a near-constant basis. They may grow out of it come second year… Results vary.
See also: Naps.
– The Ghost – Not technically a fresher you’ll “meet”, per se. This individual lives in your block, leaving signs that they exist everywhere, from the odd crumb here to the subtle thumping of a sound system there. Despite all this, you’re not entirely convinced they occupy this mortal plain as you have no actual memory of meeting them. Don’t be apprehensive! This timid creature often responds favourably to free pizza and offers to join on movie nights. Uni is a chance to enjoy and embrace multiculturalism, and this extends to the non-corporeal!
-The Post Grad – these guys have seen it all before. They’re not drawn in by the bright shiny lights and they’ve got their eyes fixed firmly on where they are going. Maybe a bit more stable than your average fresher, these folks has some valuable life wisdom.
– The Flawless -, this individual seems to have accomplished all the same Freshers’ clichés and survived utterly unscathed. They attended every lecture, even the 9 am’s, had time for every major night out, and look like they’ve had a respectable 8 hours sleep every single night regardless. Don’t encourage them; the deck is clearly already stacked in their favour.
– You – The person you are at the tail end of Freshers’ will be quite different from the one that went in, so be prepared to reintroduce yourself to yourself! When the hubbub calms and the deadlines start to approach, take some time to think about the new people you’ve met, the new things you’ve seen and done and the new places you’ve been to, and give yourself a pat on the back. You are a new person, welcome to university!